After the dramatic saga that happened during Akinyesi's 3rd marriage ceremony that was disrupted by his 2nd wife and all the backlash and brouhaha,plus the internet going agog with all forms of name calling et al. Well, the man in the middle of all the frenzy has decided to come out with his own side of the story.
Hear Solomon Akiyesi in his own words below;
I’ve not only suffered
verbal attacks, but also vituperations and near fisticuffs, all because of
another futile attempt of mine at my journey towards achieving that which I
honestly and passionately desire – a peaceful home and family. Social network
sites and blogs have been awash with how I left Lilian, my “pregnant” wife, to
marry Uloma, my Lagos “mistress” whom they also claimed was pregnant for me.
Nothing can be farther from the truth.
Only a mad or cursed man
would simply leave his pregnant wife and elope with another one. And lest I
forget, I urge you, as you read this, to have an open mind to listen to that
which is true instead of taking sides and jumping into wicked conclusions with
its attendant wicked insults and uncouth commentaries about how Solomon is
running his life and how he is not. I’m not asking for pity or trying to buy
anybody’s love at this time.
This is my life. If at my
age I don’t know what I want, then I may just remain the dumb ass that I’ve
been called over and over again. I don’t think I need anyone to give me any
lecturing on how I should exercise my privileges.
For the record, I never
planned on marrying more than one wife. And unlike the serial husband I’ve been
labelled, I had dreamt and planned a lovely home and family.
Read more after the cut.......
And my quest for this dates
back to 2003 after I had moved into Port Harcourt. I soon settled down with
Ezinne, my university days girlfriend, whom I ran into in Port Harcourt during
her National Youth Service. As fate had it, we couldn’t help reliving old times
and one thing led to another. One fateful, rainy Thursday evening in October,
2002, Ezinne came to inform me that she was pregnant.
It was as far as I was
concerned, a devastating blow to the new life I was living; rap music, cars,
money and women. So, I told her the pregnancy was unacceptable to me. Besides,
I only just started working and needed stability. But months later, Ezinne was
to inform me that she was carrying a baby girl.
And knowing my attachment to
baby girls and not wanting to ever have a baby outside wedlock, I repented and
changed my thuggish ways and asked her to marry me, more so that I was mature
enough in every ramification. Or so I thought.
And so, sometime in April,
2003, I hired a hall and invited a pastor to come officiate at my marriage with
Ezinne and bless our rings. All done, we went home and started as husband and
wife. God, the creator, knew how glad I was and looked forward to a happy home.
However, five days after that marriage, I called my new wife on my way from work
to ask what was up for dinner and she told me she had been in the hospital.
I rushed to the hospital and
was told by Ezinne that she lost the baby. I got her discharged and took her
home. But I was completely broken at the loss of a baby I had expected so much.
Four days later, I asked my wife if she actually saw the dead baby. She
responded by saying the doctor brought it but she gave instruction for it to be
buried because she could not behold the sight. Instinctively, I called the
doctor – both to thank him and to confirm because he wasn’t around when I went
to pick her home. After thanking the doctor, I asked of the sex of my dead
baby.
The doctor didn’t talk for
like six seconds. I asked him the same question again and he said he’s been
restless in his spirit and that he could no longer keep the fact that there was
no baby inside Ezinne and that nothing like miscarriage happened in his
hospital. I challenged him again and asked if he was not the same person, who
confirmed her pregnant and that Ezinne had been attending antenatal in his
hospital.
He responded that he had not
set his eyes on Ezinne since October of the previous year. Meanwhile, Ezinne
had always taken money from me for antenatal and had even shopped for the baby!
It then became clear to me that this was a fluke all together.
Sadly enough, Ezinne denied
any wrongdoing. For three years, I exposed opportunities for Ezinne to simply
tell me the truth but she never took advantage of any of the opportunities.
Alas! She was not pregnant. I decided to investigate myself and took her for
HSG where it was discovered that there were no fallopian tubes in her and that
there was evidence of previous surgery of the uterus. I independently probed
further and found out with evidence that Ezinne had a life-threatening abortion
in 1992 that resulted in the rupture and subsequent removal of her womb and
tubes.
My biggest pain was not what
I found out but the fact that Ezinne hid all this from me all these years and
was still being economical with the truth even when confronted with hard
evidence! In frustration, I moved out of the house but not before taking her to
her mum in search of the truth.
Even the mum corroborated
what Ezinne gave as excuse for the scar that runs from her navel down to her
pubic region, i.e. she was operated upon due to menstrual irregularities. I
then decided to stay out for good. While I was out, my relationship with Lillian
whom I had known years earlier grew.
I was always going to see
her in Enugu. I then got me another apartment and Lillian came around quite
often too. Gradually Lillian grew from that little girl I was merely helping in
her schooling, into a mature, witty and intelligent young woman. So, having
taken my people to Ezinne’s place for the dissolution of the marriage – since
we did only traditional marriage – I proposed to Lillian.
And, in 2007, we proceeded
to the registry for marriage. And that was the day her father started troubling
me. He insisted Lillian was not supposed to go home with me. For two years, he
cut communication with me. Shortly after the marriage, my businesses ran into a
crises and my entire life nose-dived.
There was tremendous loss in
my finances. In my travail, Lillian’s father went to the police and told them
to deal seriously with me because I was an “irresponsible son-in-law”. When the
challenges kept mounting and seeing my life was at risk after I was badly shot,
I left town to sojourn elsewhere. In 2010, I gradually re-emerged and we
started finding our footing again.
Even though I tried to
settle down again, I found that the centre could no longer hold, as Lillian had
metamorphosed into a nag and had acquired a fire tongue with which she talked
me down and reigned curses on me at any little provocation. There was no week
we didn’t have a major fight, whether I was home or not.
At some point, she became
religious. And having found her way into Winners Chapel, she suggested to me
one day that it was necessary we took our marriage to God since we hadn’t a
proper wedding. She said her church pastors were willing to help in blessing
our marriage so there could be a turnaround. To this, I obliged. She said she
would love for us to wear wedding costumes for the purpose of photographs. To
this I also consented. And so, to Winners Chapel we went and were blessed and
certificated.
But it was as if that
blessing was what someone was waiting for before they would blow the whistle
that would usher me into the hall of pain. Lillian became insatiable.
You would see tiny
ingredients of marriage only when I could ensure her comfort. Once Lillian’s
comfort was compromised, she would lampoon me and tell me my life history in
graphic details and lecture me on what Mr. A and B have done for their wives
that I’m not able to do.
It’s even worse when I try
to remind her of the recent past that I laboured tenaciously to keep her happy.
Once she told me that there was nothing I had done in the past that anybody
couldn’t have done. Imagine sacrificing all you’ve got, including almost your
life, for someone who would tell you it’s no big deal and that any other person
could have done what you did. And then, suddenly, she wanted me to quit my
acting career or she would divorce me. My phones were always her best
companions at night. If she was not reading my texts, she was in my facebook or
BBM.
I had no peace. My best
moment was whenever I had to leave home for work. And after work I never wanted
to go back home. On a trip back home sometime ago, I was praying that my
aircraft should crash and I die instead of going home. Even when I was driving
home, I was under strong temptation to ram into oncoming vehicles instead of
going home.
It was either that a long
list of demand would be waiting for me or an equally longer list of questions
about whom I had been online with and whom I had been calling and not calling.
Then on the side was a
supposed father-in-law, who claimed he regretted the marriage because he wasn’t
getting anything from it and that I only came to destroy the love that existed
in their family before the marriage. So, my joy knew no bounds when Lillian
told me last year that she was pregnant. For me, it was a good thing. Maybe the
baby would take her attention away from me at last. Then the heat started
again. I must provide N2 million for her to deliver her baby, even though she
knows my income and its source. When her pressure got to a head and to avoid
the same road I travelled with Ezinne, I took Lillian to a gynaecologist. A
scan was run on her and the result was declared before the two of us that she
was not pregnant.
This was after she told me
that she had done an independent scan and that she was carrying triplets! Even
with the medical confirmation, Lillian never stopped her push for N2 million
and money for baby shopping. I ended up suffering a partial stroke in January.
Yet she would wake me up at 2am to ask me of my plans to raise N2 million for
her, even while I was bedridden with stroke.
I knew then that I was going
to die in that marriage and had to do something about it. Ladies and gentlemen,
this is about my life. If what greeted the Internet and press was that I died,
trying to please Lillian and my marriage, people would still insult me and ask
why I didn’t take a walk. And taking a walk I tried to do but I did not do it
right.
I tried to skip due process
to avoid hurting anyone. More so, I did not have the political and emotional
will to ask for divorce. Pray, people, divorce is not like going to a grocery
store where you go to pay your money and come back with a bag full. What would
have been my ground for divorce? I should also confess that I could not find an
answer to what would happen to Lillian if I asked her to go because I was more
than a husband to her.
So, I foot-dragged to the
point of taking the easy way out. And the easy way is not usually the best way
as I found out on Saturday, April 13.
Uloma did not just jump into
the picture to “snatch” Solomon from Lillian. Uloma has been my friend since
2006. We met again in 2009 at the peak of my business crisis and have been
seeing each other afterwards. Candidly, I was swept away by the love,
understanding and the peaceful disposition Uloma proffered even as a friend,
far from the opposites I was getting back home. The way Uloma treated me was
the exact desires any man longed for in a wife. So, I was always running to her
whenever Lillian lit her fires.
So, I asked myself why I
couldn’t marry her. Far from the evil rumour that I wanted to marry Uloma
because of her money, I wanted to marry Uloma to fill a vacuum in her life and
make her happy and fulfilled because this woman with a heart of gold who has
impacted many lives deserved to be happy.
If that was what I could
ever do to plant some comfort in her life. If there was going to be any
immediate gain for me, it would have been peace of mind and its attendant long
life, not her money or any physical or material gains. I’m not a lazy man.
Apart from being an actor, I
have been in business for almost fifteen years. Years back, when I poured
millions of naira on exotic cars and a posh house in Port Harcourt, Uloma was a
seventy thousand naira recovery staff in Sterling Bank. Today, even if Uloma
gave me all her salary from where she presently works, it won’t be enough to
put Internet credit in my tablets and phones. Someone even posted that I said I
would have ‘hammered’ if I had married Uloma.
What could I possibly gain?
Uloma wasn’t frustrated to the point of desperation to pay a man to marry her.
There was no award for anyone who married her. She does not own an estate or
anything willed to her by anyone that I was running after. Uloma is not the
daughter of any rich man or top politician. She’s as much a hustler as I am.
Ok, yes, sincerely, maybe I
actually would have ‘hammered’ long life, happiness, inner joy, a sense of
being loved and long life. I also would have ‘hammered’ having her sisters as
my sisters because they love me like their own brother – a far cry from what my
own people give me.
If I had married Uloma, I
know I would have had a good burial whenever I died because I’ve always been
scared that at my level of loneliness, whenever I die, my corpse would probably
have decomposed before my people would find me. I beg to be loved and
appreciated. Nobody to call my own.
No one ever cared about me.
I have always been alone and hardworking too. From way back, my joys, my
sorrows I have always swallowed alone. But Uloma was the only person who truly
listened to my heart and understood where I was coming from. So to say any of
my failed marriages was for money is simply stupid and unreasonable. The first
car Ezinne ever drove and financing for her first attempt at business all came
from me.
Lillian was not born with a
silver spoon. Her father is only a retired naval officer and the last time I
checked he had no wealth ascribed to his name. On her 18th birthday, I bought
Lillian an exotic Corolla car. At 300 level in school, I gave her a Mercedes
Benz.
Then she graduated with an
LS400 Lexus. This is apart from a lush apartment and school bills that God used
me to help her take care of. So, who amongst these would I have married for
money? Uloma stood out because she’s shared my pain even when it was because of
me and that explains why it was a difficult task telling her Lillian was still
in my tracks.
I couldn’t have deliberately
gone out of my way to hurt Uloma, because that will be simply committing
suicide. Hurting Uloma is like waging war against a nation. Is it her legion of
admirers I will have to contend with or her nation of die-hard lovers who will
be tumbling over each other to get a pound of flesh?
I wouldn’t give hurt for the
love and hope Uloma and her family gave me. Unfortunately the same scandals I
thought I was preventing by not doing what everyone is saying I would have done
is now the same thing staring me in the face, and everyone is worse hurt.
And above all, my own life
is now seriously at risk because I feared hurting anyone. I ask all concerned
to please sheathe their swords of anger and find it in their hearts to forgive
me. I will make restitution as much as the mercy of God permits me. It’s never
too late to begin again as far as God keeps us all alive.
I’m a man on a mission for a
peaceful marriage, a good home and family life. I guess my desperation took
good reasoning off me. Again, I am humbly and truly sorry. I thank my friends
who have stood by me through this trial. Your comforting words are like lights
on my dark path.
And for the judgmental few,
I urge you; work with the truth while the Almighty fixes that which went wrong
in my life.
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